Weekend

Sorry about not posting on Friday. Sheryl and I did another "Mommy and Daddy" weekend. Thanks to both sets of Grandparents for taking in our weekend orphan children. Much like last time, this was a very relaxing weekend, filled with sleeping in, watching movies, exercising, eating out, and driving around the mountains for northern Georgia and southern North Carolina. It was very relaxing and something that Sheryl and I have committed to do every year or two to remind ourselves that we're a couple even outside of the bond that we have because of our kids. We love our kids, but we also enjoy being by ourselves without them for short periods of time.

Easter Pics

In front of the traditional Holy Saturday fire (It was cold)

With Gee in front of the Easter Egg tree

Easter Egg hunting

Sorry for the late posting. Busy day.

Powerless Part 2

As a parent, one of the most helpless times you can have in your life is when your child is sick. There are certain steps you can take depending on the illness, medicine, doctor, humidifier, lukewarm baths, but ultimately all you're trying to do is speed up the healing process. You have to wait for the body to do its work.

This is the way Sheryl and I have been with Connor for the last little while. He will get these incredible coughing fits that make his little 2 year old body sound like a 50 year old man who's smoked 2 packs a day for 30 years. They're strong and powerful and ultimately do absolutely nothing to alleviate anything. His tonsils are huge and he get sinus infections that cause drainage which causes him to cough and cough and cough.

This last Friday and Saturday were two of the worst that I've ever heard from him. It would be no exaggeration to say that he coughed at least every five minutes and sometimes when he coughed, he'd moan in pain because it hurt. He had a slight fever and sometimes his coughs were so long and so sustained that he would throw up.

And I felt powerless. There was only so much Sheryl and I could do for him. We took him to the doctor. We started him on an antibiotic. We gave him cough medicine. We stayed up to comfort him through the night. But none of it felt effective. And honestly it was frustrating. We WANTED to fix him, to make him better, but nothing we did seemed to help. He'd get a little better for a while, then another coughing fit would hit him.

We prayed. We had friends pray. We had elders pray. I might have considered sacrificing a chicken to Jobu the god of curve balls.

Like I said yesterday, I hate feeling powerless. I hate not having control over the situation. And it's funny, I don't mind God having control, but if He's going to have control, I'd like the outcome to be the one I want. It's when the outcome isn't what I want that I tend to believe God isn't in control.

Connor's doing better and we're going to have his tonsils removed after he turns 3, hopefully alleviating a lot of his issues. We're grateful to God for his overall health and what a great kid he is. And we'll trust that God is in control, even if it mean long nights awake with a coughing and hacking 2 year old.

Powerless Part 1

If you'd looked up in the tech booth yesterday morning at Otter Creek, you would have seen me pacing. Back and forth, back and forth. Shaking my hands, waiting. It's because our presentation software, MediaShout, was acting up. The presentation was taking minutes to open when it should take seconds. I had tried opening it up at 9:50 and at 9:55, it still wasn't open. I restarted the computer, and by 10:01 it still wasn't open and Murray had to start the worship time. It finally opened up during the first song, and we had some issues with it later, but it ended up ok.

I take a lot of pride in what I do in the tech booth, trying to make it as seamless as possible and as unnoticeable as it can be, to make the worship service very smooth from a tech perspective, but there are simply times that I have done everything I can to make something work and it just doesn't.

And I hate it.

I want to be in control. I want to be the one making sure that everything goes smoothly and when it doesn't, I feel like it reflects badly on me. I know it doesn't because most people understand tech issues. But it doesn't make me want to succeed any less.

What I have to understand is that I'm not in control. I'm subject to the whims of technical snafus, but even more importantly, I'm subject forces out of my control. I'm subject to temptations from the Enemy and I'm subject to God's Hand in my life. In some ways, realizing that should be freeing, but it isn't in a lot of ways. It makes me frustrated that I'm not the master of my own destiny or even a Sunday morning. I'd have thought that in my late 30s, I'd have a better understanding of that truth, but I don't yet. And perhaps yesterday was an exercise in that realization.

Dance Recital

Kinsey had her winter dance recital on Sunday. Unfortunately, the pictures didn't come out well, but here's what I got.

In the waiting area.

Connor hanging with Papa.

Blurry, but there.

She's the tall one in the center. Blurry, but beautiful.

Opryland Christmas

Every year, Opryland Hotel does a big deal with Christmas decorations, and so our life group from church decided to spend our 5th Sunday/fun Sunday out there.

These are the pictures.

Kinsey Pointing at a big Christmas Tree

Connor was asked to smile. This was the result.

Jenn and Connor-Banonnor

Kinsey and Mel outside in the cold

The Life Group (sans our absent friends)

Kinsey and Connor watching the fountain show.

Kinsey and Jenn twirling. Too cute.

This is the result of no nap and a lot of excitement. This was at 645 pm. He didn't wake up until 7 the next morning.

Fall 2008 Pictures

On Saturday, the four of us went out to a park to take advantage of the great weather and the fall colors and get some family pictures. I think they ended up very well.

I picked this one because of how well it shows the color of Connor's eyes.

Three people look great in this one. Who's the dork on the left?

I love this one, just for the expression on the kids' faces. We're saying happy cheese. Connor is in the middle of "Happy..."

I will cherish this one forever

Sister and Brother

Man, we are in SO much trouble when boys start to notice her.

Kinsey was insistent on doing a superhero pose.

Connor was close to a meltdown, but this held him off for a bit.

Just a couple of beautiful girls

Zoe Conference: Thoughts and Impressions

The Zoe Conference was this weekend at Woodmont Hills Church of Christ/Family of God this weekend. The theme this year was Fearless and that was obviously very relevant to the turbulent times that we're all in right now (although I find it interesting that we are fearful of what threatens our ability to have comforts, rather than what could threaten our lives as so many others experience throughout the world).

It was a good weekend. Sheryl and I had houseguests in our basement (Adam, Matt, and Chris) and that was fun for me and for the rest of the family too. I got a chance to spend some time with Brandon, which I haven't done for a while now. It was good to see him and Sheryl and their kids. I got to talk to Murray Sanderson, the incoming worship minister at Otter Creek, as well as renew some acquaintances from earlier conferences.

Some highlights for me. I enjoyed hearing Scot McKnight's talks and his reflections on James in the leadership conference. I really enjoyed watching the movie "Lord, Save Us From Your Followers" Thursday night. I thought the worship during the conference was excellent, even with the numbers being down quite a bit from previous conferences. I really enjoyed Jeff Walling on Friday night, even though he's not always my favorite speaker. I thought he did a really good job with this part. Cope and Harris did fantastic jobs, of course, and I really enjoyed the final session's walk through Revelation. Larry Mudd did a great job as John during it.

I do always regret that I'm not able to do more interacting during the worship conference itself. For the last couple of years, I've been running the MediaShout, so that's meant that I've needed to meet with people to get things straight and not go to any sessions or interact with people. This year was bittersweet, of course, because it was my first time to run MediaShout with Brandon, since he resigned from Otter Creek almost 9 months ago. It was like slipping into an old shoe with knowing how he likes his transitions done and when he needs the slide changed to make sure he won't sing the wrong words. I will say that it was especially weird not having the Zoe team at Otter Creek on Sunday, and knowing that they were all down at Woodmont Hills. Having the team at OC on Sundays after Zoe was always something that made me feel like OC was deeply involved in Zoe and it felt like more of a disconnect this year from that.

So, all in all, a good weekend. A weekend of thinking about what makes us fearful and the God who can be with us, even in those fears.

The iPhone Saga

Short version: I wanted to buy two iPhones this weekend (one for me, one for Sheryl). I have not yet succeeded in that task.

Long version: My family's contract with Sprint has ended (we're now on month-to-month) and with the new iPhone coming out, Sheryl and I decided to give each other iPhones as our anniversary presents. Because I get a service discount with my company, I have to do it through an AT&T store. So, earlier in the week, I head to a store to do the whole iReady thing. (Note: in order to get 2 iPhones, you must have 2 physical bodies with you, so me doing this alone is not happening. Understandable, but inconvenient)

Friday rolls around and because I have a job and family, I'm not willing to wait for 6 hours in a line. I do run by an AT&T store who ran out about 10AM. So as per my plan, I'm probably not getting an iPhone Friday.

Saturday: Sheryl has a meeting at church, so I drop her off there and then head to the AT&T store in Green Hills where they were supposed to have more iPhones. I get there and wonder of wonders, I'm first in line with the kids. I'm flabbergasted. Some other people join up behind us, I'm getting pretty excited. Until an employee comes out and says that they don't have any iPhones and don't know when they'll be getting new ones in. We could, however, backorder them and get them in about 7-10 business days. I decline, deciding to head to the Apple Store and seeing if I can possible get in there, since I'm told that I open an account there and get it changed to the business discount. Also, it's the second day of the new iPhone and surely there's not a line there any more.

Wrong.

I end up going by the Apple Store and AT&T store 3 more times over the course of the next two days and there is a line every time. I know that activations are taking a while. I know there are a bunch of people that want iPhones (including me). But seriously, when you have a product that still has lines 2 days after launch, that's not a success in the popularity of the product, that's a failure in process and inventory. When someone wants to give you money for a product, but can't, that's a failure on some end.

Here's the end of the story: I'm going to try and backorder phones today. It's not worth my time to go every day or so to check and see if iPhones are in stock, so we can survive with our current phones until then. I'd like to have the phones, but I'm not willing to wait in a line just to have them. I'd like to have them. I'd like to be able to give Apple or AT&T $600 to buy the phones. I just can't waste my time a line to do it.

Update: I went to the AT&T store on my lunch break today and was able to order the phones. They should be in in 7-10 business days at the latest. Hopefully sooner.

Open Grape Juice

Even though I haven't been able to go for the prison ministry for the last three months. I was able to get back last night. And as I have many times, I enjoyed it greatly and had a good time with the men there.

What was not so fun was not getting to take communion to them. We got to the Turney Center and brought in our bread and juice as we have for the last three years that I've been a part of it, in an opened container. And for some reason, this time, this wasn't acceptable.

I guess I can understand why. There could be a danger in someone bringing in a liquid that isn't acceptable, but seriously, we're Church of Christ. It's not like we broke out the good wine from the stone jars or something. We do grape juice. I'm sure we probably throw it away if we've kept it for more than a year.

At any rate, we didn't get to take communion to the men and we didn't raise a stink about it last night, but hopefully we can get some kind of special dispensation to make sure that next month, the guys have an opportunity to participate in the Lord's Supper.

Wherein Phil Blogs About Nothing

It was a nice weekend. I got to hang out with my family most of it, play outside with the kids, watch a couple of movies with Sheryl, and yesterday, had a really nice night with small group at home, as we worshiped a little and intro'ed our study of Luke, as translated by the Voice. And it culminated with playing some full-on Rock Band.

Yay for simple weekends. They'll be fewer this month.

Oscars and a Biblical Rumination

Yeah, I didn't see many of the movies this year so I didn't really care that much. I watched it when I got back from the prison around 9, mainly for Jon Stewart, who I liked and always do.

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In our Sunday School class, we looked at the story of Melchizedek, the priest king of Salem in Genesis 14. The specific verses say,

18 Then Melchizedek king of Salem brought out bread and wine. He was priest of God Most High, 19 and he blessed Abram, saying,
"Blessed be Abram by God Most High,
Creator of heaven and earth.

20 And blessed be God Most High,
who delivered your enemies into your hand."
Then Abram gave him a tenth of everything.

What was interesting to me was an NIV text note that said that the terms "God Most High" and "Creator of heaven and earth" were used to refer to the chief Cannanite god. Now, the assumption that we make in reading this passage is that Melchizedek was worshiping the God that we call God, or the Hebrews would have referred to as YHWH. The question I wondered about was whether or not Melchizedek knew he was worshiping and serving that God, and what would it mean if he thought he was serving another one, if the chief Cannanite god and the God of Abraham were perceived as being different.

CS Lewis didn't seem to think it mattered what the name of the God you were serving was, as long as you were doing good, as evinced in the final book of the Chronicles of Narnia: The Last Battle. The Calormene Emeth has served Tash, the enemy of Aslan, but in the restored Narnia, encounters Aslan. And the following exchange occurs:

But the Glorious One bent down his golden head and touched my forehead with his tongue and said, Son thou art welcome. But I said, Alas, Lord, I am no son of thine but the servant of Tash. He answered, Child, all the service thou hast done to Tash, I account as service done to me. Then by reasons of my great desire for wisdom and understanding, I overcame my fear and questioned the Glorious One and said, Lord, is it then true, as the Ape said, that thou and Tash are one? The Lion growled so that the earth shook (but his wrath was not against me) and said, It is false. Not because he and I are one, but because we are opposites, I take to me the services which thou hast done to him. For I and he are of such different kinds that no service which is vile can be done to me, and none which is not vile can be done to him. Therefore if any man swear by Tash and keep his oath for the oath's sake, it is by me that he had truly sworn, though he know it not, and it is I who reward him. And if any man do a cruelty in my name, then, though he says the name Aslan, it is Tash whom he serves and by Tash his deed is accepted. Dost thou understand, Child? I said, Lord, thou knowest how much I understand. But I said also (for the truth constrained me), Yet I have been seeking Tash all my days. Beloved, said the Glorious One, unless thy desire had been for me thou wouldst not have sought so long and so truly. For all find what they truly seek.

And that's not to say that CS Lewis has the final word here, but it is an interesting perspective.

Any other thoughts?

How I Got a Ticket in my Driveway

I ran out late Friday night to our local Walgreens (the Shop on Every Corner) for a few things. On my way home there are two stop signs. And admittedly, I don't usually stop all the way at them, particularly if there is no other traffic. And Friday night, I didn't.

The second stop sign is about 100 yards from my house and it's a right turn into our neighborhood. I slowed at the turn and turned into our neighborhood and as I'm turning into our driveway, I see blue lights behind me. Thinking he might be going up our street, I complete the turn into our driveway to get out of his way and he pulls in behind me.

So that's how I ended up getting a ticket in my driveway.

Sigh.

Superior Bowl

Wow, wow, wow. What an amazing game. I will admit that I was rooting for the Patriots because I wanted to see history made. However, even with that, I was extremely entertained by the entire game and the play that Eli Manning made was just insane. It was very reminiscent of the play Steve McNair made in Super Bowl XXXIV (sigh) just before the final play.

We had a bunch of people at our house for the game: most of our small group and a few extra people too, which made it a ton of fun. Kids were running around and playing, we were yelling at the plays, and there was even clapping for commercials. My personal favorite was the Macy's balloon one where Charlie Brown finally succeeded in gaining something. But I still enjoyed the Night at the Roxbury's "Baby Don't Hurt Me" Pepsi commercial, the Dorito's Mouse commercial, and the Tide talking stain was pretty entertaining as well.

However, my favorite moment of the night was a simple one. Connor decided that he wanted to come downstairs with me at one point and when I tried to put him down on the ground, he wanted to stay with me, so I got to sit in a big comfy chair with my son in my arms watching the Super Bowl. He would cheer and clap when we did and even decided to dance during the halftime show, which (sorry, Tiffany) didn't match up to Prince last year or U2 from 2002.

Great time and a great game.

The Empty Gas Can

On Saturday, I was at the Kroger near my house. I had just finished getting gas there and was getting ready to do a little shopping. As I opened my door, a man carrying a gas can approached me and asked to have a little money for a gallon of gas. Having worked downtown, it was not an unusual circumstance to have someone ask me for money and sometimes I give, sometimes I don't. On this day, I decided to go a little extra. I said, "Sure thing. Let's go fill up." So we took his gas can and I filled up a couple of gallons. He took it, thanked me, and walked off.

I went up to the front of the store and the manager and assistant manager were there watching the man. Apparently they had received several complaints about him and were watching to see what he did. I told them that I'd filled up his tank and basically that if he was legit, then now he had some gas to get where he's going and if he wasn't, then now he's not carrying an empty gas can to try and scam people with. And I went in to do my shopping.

It wasn't until last night on the way home from the prison that I realized what I'd done. Back when I read Shane Claiborne's The Irresistible Revolution, I noted that he included a quote from Dorothy Day about how the rich use charity as a buffer between them and the poor. About how the rich give away their money to prevent from having to get to know the poor.

And that's not to say that it's not a good thing to help people in need, but when I filled the guy's can up, I didn't ask his name. I didn't ask why he needed the gas, where he was trying to get to. I filled up his can as a service to him, to me and my self-satisfaction, and to my parking lot neighbors so that they wouldn't have to be bothered. And as much as I would like to convince myself, I'm not sure I did it out of love for him.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Wow. Long, long weekend. Friday wasn't too bad. Ran around a little that night.

Saturday. Y at 8. To church at 10 to start setting up for the "He Is the King" Christmas show for the rehearsal at 1. At church until 4:45. Managed to get out and get Sheryl her Christmas gift, which because I'm awful at keeping secrets, I went ahead and gave her. It's a Nikon D40 and we've needed to get a new camera for a little while and something happened on Sunday that we wanted one for.

Saturday night. Sheryl and her mom went out and did some Christmas shopping. And Connor had come down with a fever. Sheryl's mom, being a saint, offered to take Connor home to spend Sunday with her.

Sunday. Church at 8:15. Home for a couple hours. Then out to Kinsey's winter dance recital at 3, which is why we wanted the new camera (for blur-less pictures). Sheryl's mom watching Connor meant she missed the recital, which was a major sacrifice for her and Dad. I rushed from the recital and managed to get to church at 4 (slightly late for the 3pm rehearsal). At church until the show at 6 and then breaking down all the stuff we'd set up on Saturday. Left at 8:45. Home to collapse before getting up for work...

Book Review: Scarlet by Stephen Lawhead

On our non-kids weekend last weekend, I was able to sit and read the book Scarlet by Stephen Lawhead. I've been a fan of Lawhead for about 16 or 17 years now, from his Song of Albion series.

Scarlet is the second book in a trilogy called the Raven King based on the Robin Hood legend. However, there are a couple of significant differences. 1) The historical setting has changed from the time of King Richard Coeur de Leon (The Lion-Hearted) to the time just after the Norman invasion of England, 1080-1100. This is not the first Robin Hood book that I've read that did this. Sherwood by Parke Godwin did this as well and pretty well too. 2) Lawhead also changes the setting from Nottingham to Wales. Lawhead is well known for his love of most things Celtic and so this fits well into his story.

Lawhead also employs one of his other literary trademarks, which is a limited first person perspective (not to go all English teacher on y'all). The first book, Hood, was told from Bran's perspective (Bran is Rhi Bran y Hud or the Raven King AKA Robin Hood), with occasionally jaunts into the Norman/French halls of power to see the political machinations behind the choices that kill his father and force him to live as a brigand woodsman. Scarlet does something similar, which serves to introduce the readers anew to Bran and his group, while also giving the perspective of how a member of his own group of woodsmen see him. I won't say much about the plot, but it's basically Bran and his groups involvement in their wood trade, but how that also intersects with the political and religious plots of the day, of which there were many.

I really really enjoyed it and if you're a fan of the Robin Hood legend, I'd recommend both this series, as well as Sherwood. What's interesting to me about all of this is that for close to 700 years Robin Hood has been such an archetype that he's constantly being re-visioned in books and movies and tv shows. I wonder if the struggle against unjust oppressors or the re-distribution of wealth or living in the woods off the land or any of those other pieces of the legend are what keeps it going for so many years.

R and R

On Friday, I took a half day from work and Sheryl and I headed down to North Georgia. This was a no kids weekend. Her parents watched the kids for us. We took some movies, we took some books, and we took off.

And it was wonderful.

Obviously we love our kids, as almost every parent does. But there are times that we just have to get away and instead of being Kinsey and Connor's mommy and daddy, we have to get back to being Phil and Sheryl. It was so therapeutic. We slept in both days and Sheryl cooked a great breakfast. We spent all day Saturday reading or napping (or me in the van listening to the end of the Vandy-UT game). We watched Ocean's 13 and Evan Almighty and True Lies (great, not as good as the first one, but better than the second; good, not as many laughs as Bruce; very funny but slightly misogynistic as well, respectively). I read Stephen Lawhead's new book Scarlet (wonderful, and I'm sad I have to wait for 2009 for the next installment; I might write some more about this series later) and we ate at a little cafe called Shoebooties in Murphy, NC. It was basically a mini-retreat for us and we thoroughly enjoyed it. And while we're always happy to get back to our family and our house, it's this kind of thing that re-invigorates you for the wonderful work of parenting.

Anteater's Ball

Friday and Saturday I worked a show at church called the Anteater's Ball. It's a show put on by a club at Lipscomb University to raise funds for foreign charities in this case, a school in Haiti.

Whenever I go into things like this, I'm a little resentful to be honest. Yes, I'm helping out with my services and there's usually compensation for it, but it means that I'm away from my family and Sheryl's at home by herself with the kids. And I went into it with that attitude some this weekend.

Thankfully, I had a lot of fun doing the show. The rehearsal was fairly loose and people didn't get too uptight about things. I was able to joke with the kids about a variety of things and even the show went really well and was done in an hour and a half. I'll say that there were some fairly marginally talented people that performed and some exceptionally talented people as well. In fact, because of one of the performances, I downloaded (legally from iTunes) the song All These Things I Have Done by The Killers.



I might have to check out some of the other things that they've done. At any rate, a pretty good weekend overall. Look for some fun pictures and a video of Connor tomorrow.

Zoe Conference 2007 debrief

I really enjoyed the conference this year. The leadership part was really good, particularly Randy Harris talking about losing his voice, spiritually, as well as his talk in the "discernment" sessions about prioritizing the areas of change in our lives.

McLaren was just great of course, especially his opening talk where he talked about the societal machine and framing stories. His talk Friday afternoon and Saturday afternoon were also good, but not as memorable for me personally. I was kind of distracted by a few other things going on, tech wise. I had another close encounter with McLaren that I might talk about later, but maybe not.

Once the worship conference started, my work started. Outside of my kids making a cameo on the screens (must turn off screensaver next year) and a few lyrical and background glitches, I think that side of it went well. My judgment of how well I do tech work is how un-noticeable I am. I wasn't perfect this year, but I don't think it was too bad.

I'm always interested in how the songs are going to be congregationally received and sang. "You Never Let Go" was much better live acapella than I thought it was on the CD, so that was a pleasant surprise. "The Word is Alive" also came across very nicely. "Let God Arise" was generally ok. People seemed to REALLY want to clap on it, but the chorus gets weird with singing on off beats that it kind of died out. "You Are Good" wasn't too bad, but honestly, after hearing Zoe sing that with a Black Gospel group and their band before, this kind of paled in comparison.

Randy and Mike were very good in their talks and Zoe newbie Dean Barnam from Woodmont Hills did a nice job for his first time. I liked watching the painting of course, but I found the blacklight Jesus reveal to be a little bit cheesy. I know a lot of other people liked it, but hey, what can I say?

Probably the best part of the weekend for me was working with Doug Sanders. On Friday, he texted me asking if I would go run a couple of errands with him. I'm usually not able to do this, because of my full time job or on weekends trying to spend some time with my kids, but this time I was. Friday, we went a picked up a little girl whose family Doug has been working with and took her to school after she missed her bus, because she'd been pushed down. Then we took some sleeping bags to a Cub Scout group from the inner city who were going on a camping trip and met their Scoutmaster who is a great great guy. Saturday, he texted me again asking if I would run north of town to take some groceries to a family who got caught up in the food stamp bureaucracy and didn't get their stamps renewed and had no money. So Doug raided the church's refrigerator and went to Publix and we took some food to the hotel where this family of five is having to live right now. They weren't home, so we dropped off the groceries in the lobby with the manager, and Doug made another connection with HER and if she encounters people who need help, she has Doug's number and can call him. And that part to me was the best part of the weekend. Seeing old friends was great. Sitting at the feet of wise men and women was outstanding. Worshiping with great vigor was amazing. Working with a man with a heart for helping others was what truly touched me.